Almost at the home stretch. Just a few more (shitty) Pokemon to go...
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Luvdisc
Type: Water
Ability(s): Swift Swim
Luvdisc is like Spinda if he was faster, but had worse stats everywhere else and joined about 4 gyms later.
Oh god, another bad one coming, and here I thought Spinda was shitty.
You can catch these things on Route 128 using the super rod, and she
comes at the decent level of 33. However, that is pretty much the only
good thing that can be said about Luvdisc, as her stats for this point
in the game are complete shit apart from speed, which is at a pretty
good 97. On offense, we've got 30 attack and 40 special attack, which is
almost sickening to look at at this point in the fucking game (for
starters, it manages to make Spinda's offensive stats look excellent in
comparison), and an offensive movepool consisting of Surf, Ice Beam, and
normal moves (shit every fucking water type gets) does not help the
damn issue at all. Defensively, we've got 43 HP/55 Def/65 SpD, which are
similarly awful and pretty much ensures that she's 2HKO'd at best by a
light breeze.
About the only fucking thing that Luvdisc even does remotely well is
inflicting status, and even that can be done by things with more bulk.
She does get Sweet Kiss and Attract through level, which allows her to
pseudo-incapacitate most enemy Pokemon. While this is not exactly
efficient at all, a Pokemon that has been infatuated and confused only
has a 25% chance of acting, allowing Luvdisc to inflict damage with
relative safety. And she's reliant on the enemy not being able to act,
because her stats just fucking blow.
In a nutshell, if you are looking for a good lategame water type,
then you are sadly looking in the wrong direction. So let's just bury
the fucking hatchet and move on to the next Pokemon, because I'm getting
queasy just writing this shit down. The only reason she's not getting a
0 is because at least she can do something at base, and that's more than I can say for fucking Feebas.
0.5/10
Corsola
Type: Water/Rock
Ability(s): Hustle/Natural Cure
Continuing our marathon of shitty Pokemon (as well as things that can
be fished up with the super rod), next up on the list is the utterly
forgettable Corsola. This thing can be caught at ~Lv33 using the super
rod, only one level away from learning Rock Blast. Unfortunately, this
is honestly the best thing I can say about her, as her stats for this
point in the game are unimpressive, boasting only average bulk, but
having lackluster attacking stats and a really shitty speed stat. With
stats this awful so late into the game, what can Corsola do that other
waters can't?
Corsola is the only Pokemon in the Hoenn dex that gets access to the
Hustle ability, which gives a 50% boost to physical moves, but in
exchange sodomizes the user's accuracy. This allows Corsola to hit
surprisingly hard despite having a shitty 55 base attack, and getting
Rock Blast soon after capture helps. However, Rock Blast will have only
64% accuracy after factoring in Hustle, so don't expect it to connect
often. As well as RB, she also gets Shadow Ball and Earthquake, but
those moves are, of course, very contested. She can also utilize a
special set with Calm Mind and Surf/Ice Beam/Psychic if you so desire.
Overall, has a small niche, but not very useful otherwise. Loads of
things hit harder than Corsola even after factoring in Hustle.
2/10
Horsea/Seadra/Kingdra
Type: Water, Water/Dragon (Kingdra)
Ability(s): Swift Swim (Horsea/Kingdra), Poison Point (Seadra)
Another water type, this time a rare find on Route 132-134. Horsea is
in many ways similar to Trapinch in that he has an awesome final form,
but needs a lot of input to get there in the first place. Unlike the
Luvdisc and Corsola examples mentioned above, Horsea comes at a fairly
low level, being caught at Lv28 on average, or around 15 levels below
the party's level. Thankfully, Horsea isn't too far off from evolution
at Lv32, so he doesn't have to deal with his crappy unevolved stats for
very long.
Unlike Trapinch and Bagon, Seadra can access his final form
immediately after evolving due to being a trade evolution, though the
issue here is that the player also needs a dragon scale. Unfortunately,
there is no easily obtainable dragon scale (and we can't just steal Max
and Emmy's dragon scale), so if you want to evolve Seadra, you're going
to have to farm them off wild Horsea. The problem with that is that
Horsea only has a 5% chance of holding one, and he's a rare encounter at
15%, which results in a cumulative .0075% (or 3/400) chance at success.
So we go through the pain of getting a dragon scale, now what? The
evolution gives Kingdra dragon typing, giving him a solitary weakness to
dragon (prior to Gen VI, anyway, but this isn't about that), as well as
neutralizing his weaknesses to electricity and grass. Statwise, Kingdra
is very balanced, sporting 95 in all of attack, defense, special
attack, and special defense, while having 85 speed and 75 HP. In
exchange for such good stats though, Kingdra's movepool is very barren,
only getting access to stuff that other water types get, and he doesn't
learn any good dragon moves through level (he can't use the Dragon Claw
TM, and Dragon Breath is only learned as an egg move).
What if you can't trade or can't be assed to farm dragon scales? In
that case, Seadra performs almost identically to Kingdra, the only
difference between the two being that Seadra has lower physical attack
and special bulk. And having low special bulk actually matters somewhat
lategame, since lategame is very special heavy.
Kingdra's awesome, but like with Trapinch, the effort needed to get
there simply isn't worth it, at least not this late into the game.
2/10 (1.5/10 w/o trade)
Bagon/Shelgon/Salamence
Type: Dragon, Dragon/Flying (Salamence)
Ability(s): Rock Head (Bagon/Shelgon), Intimidate (Salamence)
Oh god, another Est type Pokemon... let's see where this goes.
Bagon can be found in the Meteor Falls cave network, but unlike
Solrock, this little bastard is tucked away in a small cave that
requires Waterfall to access, which essentially means that you can't get
him until the end of the game. With availability this late, what sort
of contribution can he make?
Simply put, very little, if not none. Bagon joins very underleveled,
being caught at Lv30 on average and Lv35 at maximum, with very poor
stats for this point in the game. At the very least, being caught at
Lv35 means that he only needs one level to evolve, but that isn't saying
much as Shelgon's stats are on par with Linoone and Mightyena. And we
all know how awesome their stats are. And Shelgon is kind of stuck with
his shitty stats for a while, as he doesn't evolve into Salamence
until... Lv50. I am not fucking joking. To
give an idea on how late Shelgon evolves, the only Pokemon that have a
steeper evolution level than this prior to Gen V are Dragonair and
Pupitar at Lv55 each (and neither are in the Hoenn dex). Good lord.
So we'll be extremely generous and have Shelgon evolved by the time
we reach the Pokemon League, so what are the changes? The first thing
you'll notice, besides the flying typing Mence gets, is that his stats
are through the fucking roof. Salamence has a massive 600 base stat
total, which is among the highest out of any non legendary (only Slaking
exceeds this), and has no glaring stat flaws whatsoever. On offense, we
have 135 attack, which is among the highest in the game, beating out
monsters like Machamp and Breloom, and in fact, the only non-legendary
who has a higher attack stat in Generation III is Slaking. 110 special
attack, while it pales in comparison to his attack, is still above
average, and having 100 speed helps. Defensively, Salamence could be a
bit better, but I think that 95/80/80 bulk with Intimidate access is
good enough, all things considered.
Mence also has a really nice movepool, though unfortunately, his best
level up moves are learned far too late unless Bagon's evolution is
held off. While Lv33 Dragon Breath will certainly leave a dent in
anything it touches, it is barely possible to get Dragon Claw through
level up before the credits... at Lv49 (Mence learns Dragon Claw at... Lv79.
Be thankful the TM exists.) Another helpful move that can only be
gotten by holding off evolution is Crunch, learned at Lv41 (Mence gets
it at Lv61, still too late by ingame standards, and unlike Dragon Claw,
there's no Crunch TM). Mence is also one of the very few Pokemon that
gets an HM move through level up, getting Fly upon evolving. He also
gets quite a few notable moves through TM, including Brick Break,
Earthquake, and Flamethrower.
While this is certainly impressive, remember that it takes a
significant amount of grinding to get a Mence in the first place, which I
highly doubt any efficient player will stand to do. As it is right now,
Bagon is getting a very low score, on the basis that he just joins too
fucking late and underleveled for his own good. However, if you can get
him there, he's excellent, which puts him above the likes of Spinda, in
my opinion.
1.5/10
Mawile
Type: Steel
Ability(s): Hyper Cutter/Intimidate
The last non legendary Pokemon I have to cover, and this took long
enough. Mawile can be caught in the lower floors of Victory Road at an
average level of 43 if you make your capture on B2F. So while he is more
or less at your level (well, he's about 4-7 levels below par, but
that's beside the point), I can't say the same for his stats, which are
50-55 across the board except for attack and defense, which are 85 each.
Even if Mawile joined at the same time as, say, Torkoal, his stats
would still be laughable. But no. Instead, he has Delcatty-esque stats
at a point in the game where most good things have around a 480 BST or
above.
Mawile's movepool isn't the worst I've encountered, but it certainly
could be better. Notably, he doesn't learn any STAB moves, like, at all,
and the only notable physical move he gets is Brick Break. He gets a
lot of special moves, but his special attack is fucking atrocious.
Thankfully, he does get Fake Tears through relearner to compensate, but
let's be perfectly fucking honest here: it hurts.
With availability and stats this atrociously bad, how can Mawile
possibly contribute in an efficient run? Well, he resists the STABs of
every single member of the E4, and the first three have barely anything
that can hit steel at least neutrally. At the very least, he can use
Brick Break to hit Sidney and Glacia's parties hard, and can employ a
Fake Tears+Crunch strategy against Phoebe. While he resists Drake's
primary STAB, he has too many things that hit steel super effective, and
Kingdra hits him pretty hard with Surf. And Wallace obviously sodomizes
him.
To be quite honest, even if Mawile had the availability he had in
Ruby, he'd still be bad. However, the whole double whammy of shit
availability + shit stats dooms him here. He does get fairy typing and a
Mega Evolution in X/Y, but unfortunately, it came too little too late to
salvage him here.
1/10
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Have a nice day.
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