Ice-Cold Rainy Passion Redux

Well, it finally happened. Fairy Tail's last chapter came out a few days ago, and not only has NaLu been heavily implied to be canon, Gruvia is now 100% confirmed to be canon as well. With that, GrayLu is now 100% confirmed to be dead, and I thought it would be a good idea to write an eulogy for it.

GrayLu was a crack pairing between FT mages Gray Fullbuster and Lucy Heartfilia. I honestly have no fucking idea how this pairing came to be, but my guess is that a deluded fangirl saw a panel of Gray and Lucy standing next to each other, thought they looked cute together, and started creating fanart of them.

Unfortunately, two characters looking good together does not a legitimate pairing make. There also needs to be a foundation that a romantic relationship could exist between the two characters, and GrayLu is sorely lacking in this. Even NaLi had a foundation in the form of the childhood flashbacks, even though the foundation was built on quicksand. GrayLu doesn't even have that, as Mashima gave them no emotional development even in the earlier chapters, and the interactions they do have can be interpreted as a friendship moment at best.

When compared to the development that Gruvia received, GrayLu doesn't begin to compare. Not even close. Like... the closest thing we get to anything resembling a romantic GrayLu moment is a fucking head pat, and even then, it doesn't develop their relationship beyond a simple friendship. Meanwhile, Gruvia received immensely powerful emotional development over the course of 500+ chapters. Let's think about this. If Gray didn't have feelings for Juvia, then why were they able to perform a perfect unison raid on the first attempt? Or why was it that Juvia was the first person that Gray went to for comfort after Silver's death? If Gray disliked Juvia, then why did he consent to living with her under the same roof for six fucking months? Also, recall that Gray went apeshit after Juvia "killed" herself in order to escape a life chain that Invel put on them. And finally, in the very last chapter, Gray finally admitted that he wanted Juvia's body, and that he was ok with her starting a relationship with him.

Most of the arguments that flamethrowers like ZN-Lover used to defend their pairing were already asinine to begin with, but by the GMG arc, it was pretty clear that their pairing was being fueled by high octane delusion. One common argument I've seen GrayLu shippers use is that Juvia imagines Gray and Lucy hitting on one another. About that... while it is true that she had those fantasies, one must remember that those "moments" were in another character's head, and therefore don't count. Another favorite argument these clowns use is that Gray and Lucy fight together. So fucking what? Fighting together isn't grounds for romance and even if it was, Natsu and Lucy fought together at least three times as often, and they were even called "the strongest team" by their guildmates due to their compatibility. And those are just the two most commonly used arguments. Another user named AhmedGreat2005 created a list of reasons of why Gray and Lucy are compatible, and while it has long since been deleted, most of the reasons he came up with were false, had nothing to do with romance, or both. Among the reasons he posted was that Gray and Lucy both have stalkers. On top of not being grounds for romance, it is ironic that this clown would use that as an argument, seeing as Gray's "stalker" is the only love interest he has.

Regardless, I'm actually glad that Gruvia has been 100% confirmed to be canon, so any delusions of GrayLu having a chance can finally be put to rest once and for all. And with that, there's only one thing to say: Checkmate.

TL;DR? Gruvia is canon. GrayLu is dead. Deal with it. Game Over.

Voice recorded version can be found here.

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Besides that, enjoy the pic. When Gray said he wanted Juvia's body, this is how I interpreted that line. Seriously, I can totally imagine them doing this after Team Natsu gets back from searching for Aquarius's key.

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Fairy Tail is (c) 2006 Hiro Mashima.
All unit(s) are Lv18 or above.
This image was created by Sketch Lanza. Go here and here to view his shit.

Have a nice day.

The Princess and the Dragon (2017 Version)

With only 4 chapters to go before Fairy Tail ends, I thought it would be a good time to start writing eulogies for the pairings that are clearly crack/dead. Alongside the image above is the obituary I wrote for NaLi:

NaLi was a crack pairing between FT mages Natsu Dragneel and Lisanna Strauss. This pairing came about after an omake was released relatively early on, where Natsu and Lisanna, in a childhood flashback, found an egg on the road and raised it together, becoming close friends in the process, with Lis even going so far as to (jokingly) propose to Natsu. However, this pairing was not meant to be, as 4 years after this event, an accident involving a botched take-over on Elfman's part occurred which resulted in Lisanna's supposed death.

With that in mind, you'd expect Lisanna to try to make up for lost time with Natsu after returning from Edolas? That was probably some fucking wishful thinking right there, because Lisanna barely interacted with Natsu after the first timeskip (well, outside of Chapter 367, but they didn't have much of a choice in the matter, as I'll get to in the next paragraph). Hell, during the Tenrou arc, Lisanna told Lucy to "stay close to Natsu", right before the fight with Precht (a.k.a Master Hades), which can be interpreted as Lis realizing that Natsu had moved on and she should probably do the same.

Which brings us to the infamous jail scene from Chapter 367. Despite being promoted by flamethrowers like Douglas Garret (a.k.a ZN-Lover), this scene is not a legitimate NaLi moment. How in fuck hell can it be, given the context? Let's think about this. Natsu and Lisanna were trapped in a dungeon, both stripped of their pride and chained up like Ringling Bros elephants. Not just that, but they had other priorities. Natsu in particular stormed Tartaros with the intent of busting out Erza and Mira, while Lis was worried as hell about Elfman. Then there was the whole issue with FACE potentially wiping out all magic. In short, escaping and saving the world were top priority in this situation. And as for Natsu's so-called "pervert reaction face", he was obviously shocked that Lisanna had been stripped and chained up the same way as him. Not because he was aroused by her naked body or any other asinine reason that Douglas gives. Compare this to whenever Natsu sees Lucy naked. He simply goes quiet and stares at her, with a telltale blush. This kind of reaction shows attraction, not what Natsu displayed in that cell.

TL;DR? NaLu is canon. NaLi is dead. Deal with it. Game Over.

The voice recording of this eulogy can be found here.

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Besides that, feel free to enjoy this pic of Natsu fucking Lucy in the ass.

You might remember how my previous Lanza commissions were vector colors, but since I was sitting on a ton of money, I decided to pay $10 extra for a smooth color. Well worth it.

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Fairy Tail is (c) 2006 Hiro Mashima.
All unit(s) are Lv18 or above.
This image was created by Sketch Lanza. Go here and here to view his shit.

Have a nice day.