Thursday 9 July 2015

Pokemon Emerald Ratings (Part 10)

She'll be comin' around the mountain when she comes....

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Spinda

Type: Normal
Ability(s): Own Tempo

I seriously do not know what the fuck Game Freak was smoking when they designed Spinda. Because he looks like something that came from a meth addict's wet dream. Seriously.

Found in droves in the ashy grass of Route 113, Spinda is one of those Pokemon that was made to be a practical joke, similar to Farfetch'd in the first generation. First off, this thing manages to be worse than Delcatty statwise, with 60's in every stat he has, and with no evolution to help him out, his contributions are already looking quite sour. While normal typing is offensively beneficial to anyone who has it, Spinda doesn't learn his next STAB move until Lv27, when he gets Dizzy Punch, so you may want to invest in the Secret Power TM or Strength HM because Tackle's 35 power with 60 base attack doesn't cut it at this point in the game. Even so, you'll wish you were using something with a bit more punch, because even with STAB, Spinda isn't knocking anyone's heads off.

Spinda's offensive movepool is decent, to say the least. He gets Feint Attack and Psybeam at base, which allows him to hurt fighting types and ghosts that quite frankly, aren't common enough in the midgame, and god help you if a fighting type survives your Psybeam, because his 60/60/60 defenses will not hold up to that kind of abuse. Later, he can upgrade to Psychic and Shadow Ball, and additionally, he can wield Brick Break, Shock Wave, and Water Pulse. His support movepool is actually interesting, though, getting Hypnosis at Lv23, and Teeter Dance at Lv34. For those who don't know what Teeter Dance does, it is an AoE Confuse Ray that affects everything on the filed except Spinda, which can come in handy, but again, his defensive stats don't allow for that sort of thing.

I honestly can't find a good use for Spinda lategame, other than inflicting status conditions on bosses, and you're better off attacking them head on. Basically, don't bother.

1/10


Skarmory

Type: Steel/Flying
Ability(s): Sturdy/Keen Eye

Skarmory is undeniably one of the best Pokemon in tournament play, but this rating is based on how well he does ingame. The first gripe about this thing is that he is somewhat elusive and very hard to catch. Found in the same area as that shitty panda, Skarm has a low 5% encounter rate, and on top of that, a catch rate of 25, so you will need to be very, very patient when catching one, especially since Ultra Balls are at a premium if not nonexistent.

If you do succeed, you'll have a potent physical tank with 65 HP/140 Def bases and steel/flying typing who isn't in a rush to start cockblocking the many poison and bug using ninjas found on Route 113, as well as the plethora of grass, flying, and bug users on Routes 119 and 120. Sporting 9 resistances, 2 immunities, and no physical weaknesses, it is not hard to find a situation where Skarm can simply outlast the opposition. Granted, this typing does have weaknesses to fire and electricity, which makes Skarm an extremely undesirable option against Flannery, but makes him absolute clutch against Norman, as well as a great option against Winona, though lategame isn't so kind to him since the game starts becoming more special based, and while 70 SpD is ok with all his resistances, water is one of the things he doesn't resist and it doesn't help that they resist his strongest consistent STAB option.

Skarm does have some offense issues on the outset, though. While 80 Atk/70 Spe is ok for midgame standards, it really starts to become insignificant as the game progresses due to stuff appearing or evolving that have higher offensive power, and the lack of a good movepool to offset this does not help. Steel Wing is a decent tool that Skarm can learn to deal with this somewhat, but this is learned at Lv32, but he can easily take the TM for it since it gives him a powerful midgame nuke. This is notable considering that his starting moveset consists of Peck and Swift, which is ass considering that he doesn't get his next STAB move until Lv29. Also, Skarm wishes he got Drill Peck through level up and not through breeding.

Another interesting move in his arsenal is Spikes, learned at Lv42. While this move is dead weight against the twins (around the time you reach Lv42), you can use Spikes to really wear down some of Juan's Pokes, mostly his Kingdra who has no easily exploitable weaknesses (and the one weakness he does have is killed instantly by Ice Beam), as well as the stuff on Phoebe, Glacia, and Wallace's teams, since the Pokes they have are somewhat bulky. However, to get its maximum effectiveness, you need to put up three layers, which is a waste of time, and you are open to attack at this time, and this is bad considering Juan, Glacia, and Wallace bombard you with strong neutral special attacks, which of course, Skarm doesn't particularly enjoy taking.

While I do give him points for his ability to tank the midgame, his offense as well as his mediocre lategame performance kind of doom him. Still, he's not bad.

6.5/10


Swablu/Altaria

Type: Normal/Flying, Dragon/Flying (Altaria)
Ability(s): Natural Cure

Oh look, another normal/flying type... wait. This thing becomes a dragon?!

Found in droves in the cesspit known as Route 114, Swablu looks, acts, and plays like any other normal/flying type I've ever seen. In a sense, you could say that it's the Hoenn equivalent of Doduo (mid-joining bird mon), but that's wishful thinking right there. Right off the bat, he has terrible offense with 40/40 attacking stats, 50 speed, and being stuck with Peck and Fury Attack for a natural movepool until Lv31, when he gets Take Down, and unfortunately, this doesn't improve a whole hell of a lot after evolution, which is at a rather late Lv35. As usual, the Secret Power TM can help somewhat, but even so, you will be wishing you were using Taillow.

Another look at Swablu's stats reveals that he is surprisingly bulky for a normal/flying, with 45 HP and 60/75 defenses, which can allow him to stick around for extended periods of time against most trainers, though with the lack of offense, you aren't doing much in return, and normal/flying isn't good defensive typing. Still, you'll appreciate it against all those scary bug catchers and aroma girls, which coincidentally are his only good matchups, because his attack sucks too much to make any significant impact against other trainers.

Going back to my first statement, the developers tried to spice things up by making Altaria a dragon type upon evolution, even gaining Dragon Breath in the process. While this opens up a few more defensive opportunities (you gain fire and water resistances as well as having your electric weakness neutralized, allowing you to make better use of your 75/90/105 defenses), offensively, Altaria loses STAB on Take Down and other assorted normal goodies, and that is kind of a big deal considering he still has poor attack stats to deal with (though Lv40 Dragon Dance alleviates this somewhat on the physical end), and Dragon Breath's 60 BP doesn't cut it lategame with said attacking stats. The Dragon Claw TM is a welcome answer to this issue, but it appears very late.

Like I said before, Swablu's level up movepool is a greater joke than the Detroit Lions, consisting of stuff that's better off used in tournament play (though Sing is quite useful for catching Regis), and doesn't get a good damaging move until Lv31 when he gets Take Down. Not only that, he doesn't get any flying moves through level up until Lv59 when he gets Sky Attack, which is way too late to matter, not to mention the whole 2 turn thing where you're a big fucking target during the charge phase. Thankfully, Altaria has a good TM movepool. Since he does not get any flying moves through level-up, the Fly HM is almost mandatory, and Dragon Claw is also needed during the endgame because Dragon Breath does crap damage off only 70 SpA. As well, Altaria gets Earthquake and Flamethrower, among other things like Ice Beam and Solar Beam.

Swablu also has it rough when it comes to boss performance. While he should never participate in the Lavaridge or Petalburg gym leader matches, whether or not he's usable against Winona depends if he evolved or not. Even so, expect Skarm to be the bane of your existence, whatnot with its steel typing and her own Altaria can kill you just as quickly as you can kill it. And his performance against the last two gyms is quite forgettable since his damage output is below average, not to mention that two of Juan's Pokes pack ice moves, and getting iced is the last thing Altaria needs. His elite performance is more or less the same, with Glacia and Drake tearing him apart with strong super effective STAB and Wallace doing much of the same with three of his mons packing ice moves.

In a nutshell, Nintendo thought that making Altaria a dragon type would instantly make him good. However, stats tell more of the tale, to be perfectly honest, and defensively oriented dragons just don't work.

3/10


Seviper

Type: Poison
Ability(s): Shed Skin

Seviper is like Ekans from FRLG, except with more attack and a better movepool, but worse speed and no Intimidate.

Caught at ~Lv16 in the same grass that you found Swablu, Seviper looks promising enough at first glance. Unlike Ekans of FRLG fame, he is self sufficient right off the bat with 100/100 offenses and STAB Poison Tail. For starters, most midgame Pokemon would kill to have 100 in either offense, let alone both of them, so Seviper is doing alright for himself, but poison is a very depressing type offensively, and while Bite can alleviate this to some extent, you are still quite helpless against steel types, so you may want to consider the Dig TM.

Once you look beyond those sexy 100 attacking stats, however, Seviper's stats are quite lacking. 65 speed isn't exactly what I'd call fast; being barely faster than Swampert, Seviper will undoubtedly get outsped later on. Of course, Swampert has 100/90/90 defenses and a single weakness to a rare attack type to fall back on while Seviper has 73/60/60 defenses and weaknesses to Earthquake and Psychic, meaning that he will undoubtedly get killed very quickly, and the lack of Intimidate like FRLG Ekans does not help.

While Seviper's level up movepool is actually quite disgusting once you look past that early Poison Tail and Lv28 Crunch (Glare can help with catching legendaries, but sleep is overall better anyway), he does get his fair share of good TM moves. Dig has already been mentioned, and later on he can grab Earthquake for even more steel killing fun. As for his special moves, he can utilize Flamethrower and Giga Drain, the latter of which hits ground/rock types. Also, he really appreciates the Sludge Bomb TM considering his next poison move through level is basically Poison Tail but with a 30% to inflict Toxic.

Basically, a slow glass cannon with awful offensive typing and a terrible level-up movepool.

4/10


Solrock

Type: Rock/Psychic
Ability(s): Levitate

Solrock is kind of like Zelot from Fire Emblem Binding Blade: Useful when you get him, but really falls behind lategame.

The only new Pokemon that you can catch in Meteor Falls before you have access to Waterfall, Solrock has a good overall start, being a rock type when the typing is still useful. It helps that he can be caught at the high level of 18, so he can immediately begin pulling his weight with STAB Rock Throw coming off a good 95 base attack. What makes this even better is that he comes right before the firefest that is known as Mt. Chimney and Lavaridge, making him a good pick for those fights as well. I mean, it's like a dream come true! Secondary psychic typing is cool and all, but he's not doing much damage from that side with 55 SpA. He is also a fine pick against Norman as well due to normal resistance and good 70/85/65 defenses, though I should warn you that a lot of things on his team carry Feint Attack, so be wary.

Of course, all good things must come to an end, and in the case of Solrock, lategame is really unkind towards him. While he does have a type advantage against Winona, virtually all her Pokemon except Swablu and Altaria can hit him super effectively (and even those two can beat him due to Perish Song and Dragon Breath parahax respectively) and you will find that Rock Throw's damage is quite underwhelming here; Rock Slide would fix this problem, but it's learned at Lv37, after the 6th gym fight. He does ok against the twins due to psychic resistance as well as being able to evade Claydol's Earthquake, though you will need the Shadow Ball TM here since you aren't doing much to them without it, and Juan is lol. Not to mention the fact that everything after Lilycove is a huge waterfest, which is bad news tidings for Solrock. The final nail in the coffin is the elite four, where Solrock is disadvantaged against every one of the final bosses (Sid, Phoebe, and Wallace beat him by type alone. Glacia has a Walrein knowing Surf as well as Crunch on both Glalies. Drake has a Kingdra knowing Surf as well as Crunch on Flygon and Salamence.)

I already mentioned natural Rock Throw and the somewhat late upgrade to Rock Slide at Lv37, but he gets some interesting moves through level up, notably Cosmic Power, which can allow him to simply tank his way through boss fights, but in practice, this is hard to do since everyone and their mother hits him super effectively or has other means of disposing of him. Explosion could've been useful for taking out problematic Pokemon like Juan's Kingdra, if it wasn't learned at Lv49. The tutor exists, but it is better used on things that don't get Explosion naturally. As for TM coverage, I already mentioned Shadow Ball against the twins, but he also gets Earthquake a little bit after that, though both moves have heavy competition. While he gets special moves like Psychic, Flamethrower, and even natural Solar Beam (learned at Lv43, probably just in time for Juan), they seriously aren't doing much damage off 55 base special attack.

Nice midgame utility, but holy fuck does his lategame suck.

5/10


Spoink/Grumpig

Type: Psychic
Ability(s): Thick Fat/Own Tempo

Another psychic type who is an alternative to either Ralts or Abra if you want to try "something different" (which by the way, both Abra and Ralts are better). While he doesn't have the offensive presence that the other two have, or the utility against Brawly, or their early evolutions (Spoink evolves 2 levels later than Kirlia FFS, and you can get an Alakazam before Ralts evolves), Spoink has good special durability for an unevolved Pokemon and Thick Fat access, allowing him to level up with relative safety in the Lavaridge gym (though Flannery's sun-boosted Overheats will probably still be too much for our little pork chop), but this is generally superfluous until lategame, when special attackers start showing en masse.

While he can't hold a candle to Kadabra on offense, Grumpig still has a good offensive game with 90 base special attack (70 as Spoink) and STAB Psybeam right off the bat, with Psychic being learned around the time Kadabra gets it. However, like with Kadabra, Grumpig has coverage issues, being basically limited to Shock Wave on the special side (no elemental punches until postgame). While Grumpig does get access to things like Shadow Ball and Iron Tail, he's not impressing anyone with them since his attack is rock bottom. As far as other moves go, an interesting move of note is Magic Coat, which will bounce back most status effect moves, including but not limited to Toxic, Leech Seed, and Sand-attack, but you will generally find that attacking or setting up with Calm Mind is a better use of your time, and the rest of Grumpig's story mode movepool is garbage.

As I may have said before, the psychic type's best moment ingame was in the Brawly fight, which Spoink is far too late for, being available between Mt. Chimney and Lavaridge and all, so his contributions in boss fights are a bit limited since psychic doesn't hit any of the remaining gym leaders' Pokemon super effectively, and he is dead weight against the twins due to their mutual resistance and the fact that your other options do diddly dick. The elites are also quite unkind to Grumpig, considering the first two use types that are strong against psychic, especially Sid, who simply laughs at your feeble attempts to Psychic his Pokemon. He is at least good against Glacia (no thanks to Thick Fat if he has it) provided you are mindful of her two Glalies, which pack super effective moves, though thankfully, you can tank non-STAB Crunch just fine with your 80/110 special bulk. He also hits Wallace's Tentacruel super effectively if you are interested.

Basically, mid to late joining psychics have it rough, and Spoink kind of proves it, but even so, he can still manage to be a decent Pokemon. Just don't expect anything exceptional like Gardevoir. That's just some wishful thinking right there.

5.5/10


Wynaut/Wobbuffet

Type: Psychic
Ability(s): Shadow Tag

In Lavaridge Town, an elderly woman hands you an egg that will eventually hatch into this thing. Of course, hatching the egg in any reasonable timeframe for Wynaut to have any sort of use whatsoever is a pain in the ass because it takes at least 2560 steps (assuming you have a Slugma in the lead, otherwise, it's 5120 steps) to hatch, which means you either dick around and waste time hatching it and have it in time for the Lavaridge gym, or you carry on your journey and have the egg hatch while you explore the SS Cactus or something. Either way, the hatchling comes at Lv5, where he is not only hideously underleveled, but has as many offensive moves at base as GrayLu has legitimate romantic moments (READ: zero), being stuck with Splash, Encore, and Charm until Lv15, when he finally gets Counter and Mirror Coat (and evolves into Wobbuffet). This alone would make Wynaut one of the most inefficient Pokemon in the game, along with Nosepass, but thankfully, you can find wild Wobbs in the safari park, so why even bother with the fucking egg, anyway?

Even if you do decide to catch a Wobb in the wild, you will find that he is nothing more than a living punching bag. Counter and Mirror Coat are literally the only tools he has to cause damage (other than Destiny Bond, but you need to die in order to get any damage from it), but considering his stats (both offenses are rock bottom at 33 apiece), they are all he needs to cause some good damage, and with his massive HP, he can take on most of the later gyms and elites (do be mindful of Sidney and Phoebe, who smack him around super effectively and are immune to Mirror Coat and Counter, respectively) and remove problematic Pokemon like Drake's Salamence, assuming he's properly trained, but that's where his issues begin. If your Wobb isn't freeloading off your other Pokemon with the Exp. Share (which isn't very enjoyable since your other dudes will end up slightly underleveled in return), he is either grossly underleveled, or simply dicking around and waiting for the opponent to deal enough damage to him so he can counter enough damage to take the other guy out.

If used liberally, you will find that Wobb really hates being fucked over by status conditions, has his Counter/Mirror Coat hit rates being fucked up by assholes using Double Team or Sand-Attack, and just having to get damaged in order to have anything resembling a fucking offense. And to top things off, Wobb is a potion hog because of the fact that he needs to get damaged in order to cause damage, and because of his high HP, it usually takes more than 2 super potions to get his ass back to relatively full HP (thankfully, hyper potions exist by this point, so w/e).

Overall, Wobbuffet can fill a niche, but that niche is usually detrimental to efficiency, and I'm going to be perfectly honest here: Lategame isn't a terribly great time to have psychic as a defensive typing. I do not know how the enemy's AI works in this game, but I'm pretty sure that they are a bit less predictable than in gen II. I will give him some slack for at least being able to troll powerful boss Pokemon like Drake's Salamence and Glacia's Walrein.

4/10

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Have a nice day.

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